You cover a lot of bases in the two articles Marcus and I cannot go into everything here and now, partly because I am not sp mind focused as I used to be and try and think less these days; also because they need more time to digest. Or rather, I do. But a few things: yes, we maverick thinkers don't necessary do so well in 12-step groups. I was in rehab in my mid 20s and am now 60. But when I became a professional in the field and introduced the subject of past lives, I became the object of some amusement among my colleagues, although many of the patients caught on fast. I was different and I did not fit. That has never changed. I am glad to say my son (my three were all born in sobriety) just notched up his first year but has his own unique relationship with 'the fellowship' whereas I have not gone for years. My meditation journey seems to work for me. As a young boy, I was in exile from family fairly early on because I knew family secrets they didn't want telling. Yes, narcissism again. I hear what you say about connectivity although I rather like my outsider status and see the most important connection is realignment with my own soul, for want of a better word. 34 years on, I feel free, particularly free of concepts pulling at me. I doubt I will ever go to meetings again and will certainly not be working in the industry again. But what a beautiful and painful road it can be, yet I have a sense of home now and it is very simple, my needs and wants rather spare and I like it.